Funny wedding toasts
A legal wife is a real pearl in the hands of her husband, who shines with her beauty and illuminates the path with light. Let's raise our glasses to ensure that the spouse carefully preserves this priceless pearl given to him by fate! Each of us has our own destiny, and I want to raise a glass to the destiny of the young people - to the destiny thanks to which they met. May she continue to be supportive of our beautiful lovers! Take a look at this wine glass filled with champagne - let your home be like a full cup! The champagne in this glass is sweet and sparkling - let there be fun in your relationship, let all your days and nights be sweet and unforgettable! Bitterly! My dear newlyweds! Let my toast be a little short, but it will have the most positive energy. I wish you to walk through life with a kind heart and pockets heavy with money! You know that the worst wish you can make for newlyweds is to wish them a good wedding night. So, I wish you a restless night, so that you don’t sleep until the morning! I will drink to the bottom for this and advise everyone to do the same! My dears! Today your family ship goes to sea for the first time. Let's drink together to the successful voyage of your ship without life's storms. Happy sailing! Congratulations to the newlyweds on the day of registration of their family! Create warmth of feelings and care for each other in your nest. Chirp, sing and raise more chicks! The groom stole the bride's heart, and she stole his last name. Overall, I'd say both count. So let's drink to the lovers on their wedding day! Let the Compass of Life show you the way, You won’t turn away from its path. Who matters more - Libra will decide, Who lived longer - The Clock will decide. And only we can decide now, Who will kiss harder. Bitterly!
Cool wedding toasts
You all know that our country is struggling with four serious problems from year to year. These problems are winter, spring, summer and autumn. I would like to wish our newlyweds that in their long and happy family life there will be no other problems except the change of seasons.
Let's drink to the proof! After all, this wonderful couple is real proof of the existence of bright and pure love. Guys, always remain as in love and faithful to each other.
I believe that coincidences are completely non-random. And our newlyweds met because fate pushed them towards each other. Let's drink to the young! May fate continue to be favorable to them.
They say that a man invented kissing because he couldn’t find another reason to shut a woman’s mouth. And we wish the newlyweds to kiss as often as possible and for absolutely no reason! Bitterly!
Short and funny wedding toasts
I want to raise a glass to the happiness of the young family! They say that true love is endless. Let it be so for you too. Love and appreciate each other. For the young! Bitterly! “When you chase happiness, one day you will realize that it was right under your nose all along.” It’s so good that our newlyweds found their happiness quickly enough! For the young! Bitterly! After the introduction of Prohibition, there were much more divorces in the world, because many men looked at their wives with sober eyes for the first time. So let's drink so that our groom will always be drunk without wine from his beautiful wife. Bitterly! I would like to raise a glass to our groom’s mother-in-law and father-in-law! Compared to the family from this joke, our bride’s family is undoubtedly wonderful, friendly and cheerful! Let's drink to this wonderful family! Dear newlyweds! I wish you that one day you will be attacked: let money attack you in a dark alley, and you will not be able to fight it off. Bitterly! I would like to wish the young: In joy, separation or sorrow, To forever remember the first hug, Forgetting about the last quarrel. Nowadays, we often hear: it’s not a wonder that they separate, it’s a wonder that they live. And we wish you to live a wonderful life. And even more - amazingly wonderful! Dear young people! The great Spaniard Cervantes said: The lover, in whose breast love is fed again and again by Doubts, is unworthy of Her holy peace. So let's drink so that our bride and groom never doubt each other! What is a mixed feeling? This is when your mother-in-law in your Zhiguli car flies into the abyss. So let's drink so that mixed feelings never visit you! “Happiness is when you are understood.” This is true. I want to wish our young people mutual understanding and love for many, many years to come! Happiness to you, dears!
Let's toast to the mathematics of family life: to the addition that made a married couple come together; for subtracting both from the number of bachelors and unmarried; for dividing all sorrows and difficulties in half; for multiplying your family by having children! For the young!
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Let our young people know the secrets of wedding plans: That storks often bring children to empty houses. Or they leave them in the cabbage, Sometimes they bring them straight into the house, So that neither despondency nor sadness arises in that house! Bitterly!
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As they said in ancient Babylon: if you grab your chest, say something. Take a glass - say a toast. Here is my wish: “May two loving hearts never separate, may they grow together in sweet fidelity, as the creator wanted.” Congratulations on your legal marriage!
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A bachelor boasts to a friend: “I will have a beautiful, smart, faithful and thrifty wife.” - All this is good. But how do you cope with all four? Our groom is lucky, his (Name) is beautiful, smart, faithful, and thrifty. All that remains is to cope. However, I am sure that the young man is capable of this task. For the young! Bitterly!
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“ Dear brother” I won’t hide, brother, I envy you! You got a wife - just what you need! He irons his trousers, cooks borscht for lunch, and for dinner - marinated shish kebab...
And you appreciate your chosen one! Don't hide romantic feelings for her! And if you need a drink, come see me. My wife will let you go with me!
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Eastern peoples have a parable that says that marriage is just a mirage, something like an oasis in the desert, where there are palaces, palm trees and camels. First the palace disappears, then the palm trees, and then only the camel remains. We wish that your marriage and your family happiness do not turn out to be an oasis. Make your lover's paradise a reality. And let in your life there be a cozy house instead of a palace, a family tree instead of palm trees, and a luxury car instead of a camel.
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A typical incident for our time occurred with one tipsy bar visitor. When he was returning home, bandits attacked him and demanded “his life or his wallet.” The poor guy had to part with his money. Let's drink to the fact that only the wife takes away our young man's wallet, and he gives his life to her himself! Bitterly!
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The world knows many jokes that ridicule marriage relationships: supposedly after marriage everything immediately goes topsy-turvy, but let’s try to remember at least one good one! I have one in mind, listen! One man was asked how he was living with his newlywed, to which he said: “She and I lived happily, carefree for twenty-five years... until we met each other.” I want to wish the newlyweds that their happiness will certainly begin from today’s wedding day and never leave their home!
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On this beautiful, bright day, I want to wish you a lot of money and health to take a walk to your heart's content, and when you settle down, let a white stork fly to your house with a heroic baby. But seriously: only happiness, because it is the most important thing. There will be happiness - everything else will definitely be good!
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O bottom of the heroes of today's celebration, the bride, is a dangerous person: she is an arsonist, and the groom agrees with me, since she has placed a flame in his heart. But I am sure that now she is bound by such a chain that cannot be broken. We drink to the health of our dear captive!
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Love and family mean a lot in a person’s life. To be able to carry your warm feelings for each other through the years, you must learn to hear each other without words. I wish you that even kilometers away from each other, you can hear what your other half is thinking about.
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Dear young people! We hasten to congratulate you and, with our awkward toast, I hope we will make you laugh. We wish you good luck, Well, what would we do without it? So that your parents would quickly give you a home. Let grief and misfortune bypass your house, So that only peace, love and kindness are between you. So that a pair of legs would quickly knock on the floor, So that those legs would not know any crooked paths. So that you live in harmony, For each other so that the mountain, To the diamond wedding So that you invite us with you!
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Dear newlyweds! I propose a toast so that in your family life you always remember the words of the French writer Jean Rostand: “A good family is one in which the husband and wife forget that they are lovers during the day, and that they are spouses at night.” . Let's drink to make sure this happens in your family!
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One day, curious people came to the sage and began to ask their questions. One of them was a young man who asked: “Who do you think was the happiest man on earth?” To which the sage answered without hesitation: “Adam! Because he didn’t have a mother-in-law.” But in my opinion, if the first person had such a kind, loving, caring mother-in-law like mine, then he would be able to become a million times happier. Let's drink to the wonderful mother of my beloved!
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Love is not a fire; once it catches fire, you can’t put it out. The fire of love burns in the hearts of our young people. This is the sacred fire. So let's fill our glasses, glasses, wine glasses and drink together so that it never goes out in their hearts!
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On the first of September the student went to school for the first time. After classes, he comes home and immediately approaches his parents with his fists: “Why didn’t you warn me... that these bagpipes are for ten years!” We must warn the newlyweds that the bagpipes, the beginning of which we are celebrating, are not even for ten years, but for life! Let's drink to the fact that these bagpipes will always be a joy for them!
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They say that happy people are happy because they think about what they have. And the unfortunate think about what they don’t have. I want to raise this glass to our newlyweds, so that they always think about what they have, and it would fill them with happiness! For the young!
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Our fiance is a real astronomer. He discovered an incredibly beautiful star, his charming bride. Let's raise our glasses so that she always has the strength to illuminate her husband's path with the light of care, devotion, and love!
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Be healthy, live richly, As far as your salary allows you. But know: the salary is always not enough. Shake all your ancestors - they will give you more. You have twice as many parents. Love them deeply, stay longer. Don't be afraid of booties, don't be afraid of diapers, Give birth to boys, give birth to girls. If parents are tired of children, throw them to their grandmothers - they will educate them. But most of all I wish, however, that there would be no marriage from your marriage!
“ Moisha , who always gave $10 to a beggar, today gave only $5, explaining that now that he got married, he is forced to cut expenses. To which the indignant beggar replied that he was not going to support Moisha’s family. So let’s drink to the fact that the husband always knows how to ensure the well-being of his betrothed!”
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What can you wish for the bride and groom? So that we can always be together in everything. We slept, ate, drank together, took the children to kindergarten.
So that there is no reason for quarrels - So that the man is always decisive, And the wife is young and beautiful, And so that you do not live in vain!
And only take care of your love, And only at the wedding may it be... BITTER for you!
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As many here know, the word marriage is a homonym with several meanings. The first is a marital tandem, the union of a loving couple by marriage, and the second is a defect in the product. Unfortunately, it happens that these two seemingly unrelated concepts are closely intertwined during the life of a husband and wife together. Dear heroes of the occasion! I would like to wish you to live in peace, mutual understanding, harmony, so that your marriage never becomes defective. For your happiness! Bitterly!
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You've probably noticed that spouses who have lived together for many years have the same interests and tastes. In our family, for example, both my wife and I love... me! And we have known the groom not so long ago, but we also have the same tastes - he and we all like his bride! I propose to drink to the beautiful bride!
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Today we have gathered here to witness the beginning of the journey of two wonderful people. Out of the 7 billion people on the planet, these two chose each other. They are destined to become parents of wonderful children who will change the world for the better. Parents and relatives of each of them can rest easy - this young family will protect each other and always support each other in difficult life situations. Let's raise a glass to the newlyweds' health and other blessings! Have a long and happy life together!
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As the English playwright Bernard Shaw said: “When you chase happiness, one day you will realize that it was right under your nose all along.” It’s so good that our newlyweds found their happiness quickly enough! Never lose your happiness, take care of it and cherish it! For the young! Bitterly!
We give you cabbage so that the house is not empty. We give you onions, so that you don’t experience severe torment. We give you carrots so that there is love in the house. We give you a tomato, so that discord will pass through your home. We give you a cucumber, so that the groom becomes a father sooner. We give grapes so that your home will always be rich. Here's how much they gave. Well, now it’s “Bitter!”
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If a man is persistent, he will definitely achieve what a woman wants. So let's drink to the fact that the desires of men and the desires of women coincide! For a strong and harmonious union of two hearts! Bitterly!
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The honeymoon is the happiest time for spouses: a time of carelessness, lightness, passion, sublimity of feelings, tender trembling of lovers. Let us wish the newlyweds that their honeymoon will last a lifetime.
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They say that in an ideal family, the wife does not pay attention to where the money comes from, and the husband does not notice where it goes. May you have a truly ideal family.
And there was a trial in the case of a terrible accident - there was a head-on collision between two cars, everyone survived. The judge calls a woman sitting in one of the cars and asks: “Tell me, what happened? How did the accident happen? To which she replies: “How it happened! As usual, I sat in the front seat and controlled the movement of the car. And my husband was driving.” I would like to tell the heroes of the occasion that a car called “family” is a vehicle that is not easy to drive. So let their journey be easy and happy!
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Dear newlyweds, I sincerely congratulate you on your wedding day! I wish my wife never to be a “saw”, but also not to be a “log”. And I want my husband to behave in such a way that his wife is always waiting at home with pies, and not with a rolling pin in his hand. In general, live together and never quarrel!
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Friends ! Today at an early hour the muse suddenly visited me! She came to ask about you and gave you a toast for good luck! What tender words She dictated to me, brothers! And... my head started spinning! I have to admit now... Look for eternal words, Draw up tenderness with a spoonful! And let it burn like firewood, the inevitability of love passion! And Muse’s toast was simple: “We must love each other steadfastly!” And I, a single boy, Raising my glass, will shout to you: “Bitter!”
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When my husband comes home early, he thinks: “What should I read?” And when he comes home too late, he thinks: “What should I write?” So let's drink so that our newlywed will never forget how to read between the lines, and the newlywed will never become a literary classic!
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There is such a modern parable, a story with some hint, when two friends are talking and one asks the other: - How many times have you gotten married? “I’m ashamed to even say it,” answers another. “Well, well,” the second one consoles, “in our time you don’t have to be ashamed of anything, let’s say how much!” - Just one time! - was the answer. So I want our newlyweds to be - in a good way, of course - also ashamed. So that they have only one marriage - the only happy and reliable union today!
In this we know the philosophical concepts: form and content. So, one philosopher was asked: - How does form differ from content? He answered like this: “If there is a form, then you need to... take it for maintenance!” He is asked a counter question: “What to do if there is both form and content?” “Then,” says the philosopher, “you need... to get married urgently!” I propose to raise a toast to the groom! In my opinion, he is well versed in philosophy!
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There is a wonderful parable about a husband and wife. Every day the couple ate a muffin for breakfast. They divided it into two parts: lower and upper. The wife always got the top part, and the husband the bottom. After several years of marriage, namely on their wedding anniversary, the wife took the lower part for herself, saying that she had always wanted this. To which her husband replied that he, on the contrary, wanted the upper part, but he left it for his beloved, because he thought that she loved her more. Let mutual understanding and reverent attitude towards your soulmate always reign in your family!
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On your wedding day, we would love to make sure that you are never left with a memory. So that you remember those days when you saw each other for the first time, when you first gave each other a kiss, and this day when all your closest people gathered around you and loudly shouted “Bitter” to you. Bitterly
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About the bottom of the married couple lived to see their blessed wedding - 70 years. And all these years the couple were affectionate and happy. When they were asked what the secret of such long-term family happiness was, they answered: “The whole secret is that all these seventy years we have had a single bed.” So let's drink to the eternal single marital bed!
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What happens in the first year of married life? He speaks - she listens. Second year: she speaks - he listens. Well, in the third year: both speak - the neighbors listen.
So let's drink to our newlyweds living their whole lives like the first and second years, listening to each other! Then love will show them the way to happiness!
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In the words of Rogers: “Live, young people, so that you will not be ashamed to sell your pet talking parrot to the main gossip of the city!”
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Everyone present undoubtedly knows God's nine commandments: do not kill, do not steal, do not commit adultery, honor your parents, etc. Do you know the commandments of the feast? Let's remember them! First: a sober person at a wedding is a spy; being at a wedding but not being drunk is a sin. Second: drink a little, but drink it all. Third: whoever drinks well will remember well. Let us raise our glasses to these blessed time-tested commandments and vow never to break them in the name of the happiness of our newlyweds!
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One day I was at my brother’s wedding. So, on their wedding night, the newlyweds read the fairy tale “Ivan the Tsar’s Son,” and after the allotted time, a beautiful baby was born to them! I also went to my sister’s wedding, where the newlyweds read the fairy tale “Marya the Mistress” on their wedding night, and soon they had a beautiful daughter! There was a case when I attended a friend’s wedding. So there the young people read the fairy tale “Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs” at night. And what do you think? Now they already have 7 sons and a sweet daughter! So let's drink to our newlyweds reading today the fairy tale about Tsar Saltan and the forty heroes!
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M newlyweds, please tell me how children are born? Do not know? I will remind you of three ways how and where you can find them. First, order them from the stork. Second, look in cabbage. And thirdly, go to the store. But I want to drink to the fourth way to replenish your family - the most pleasant and proven one! For the young and their future children!
like the sea: sometimes calm, sometimes a storm of 10 points. And only the strongest ships can withstand its instability. Let's drink to the ship of your love and may it sail on the right course for many, many years to come!
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You have a reason for happiness, you are doing well today, you have created your own family, I want to congratulate you!
I appeal to the bride, Learn to work with dough, Bake pies for your husband, Don’t bite for your friends!
Well, you, groom, look, take care of your spouse, buy fur coats, diamonds, and always give gifts!
Well, to be serious, I wish you happiness and live without troubles, I drink to your dregs today, I wish you long years!
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An exemplary wife will never reprimand her husband for over-salting scrambled eggs, and an exemplary husband will always pretend not to notice how his wife nails a nail crookedly. So let's drink to an exemplary marriage and complete mutual understanding of our happy newlyweds!
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A man asks God: “Lord!” Why did you create women so beautiful and at the same time so stupid? – Beautiful – so that you men can love them. And the stupid ones - so that they can love you, men. If a woman is beautiful and smart, it is, of course, difficult for her to love a man. This man must be exceptional. This is our groom. Let's drink to our exceptional groom and smart, beautiful bride!
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Cancer is like a kitchen. Everything is boiling, seething, and sometimes it gets so hot that you can even get burned. But if you clearly control the process, then in the end you can get a real masterpiece that will not only please the eye, but will also drive you crazy with its taste. Let's raise a glass to the young family and let them enjoy the wonderful moments spent together!
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How did the word “family” appear? Once upon a time the earth had not heard of him... But before the wedding Adam said to Eve: “Now I will ask you seven questions.” Who will give birth to children for me, my goddess? And Eve quietly answered: “I am.” “Who will raise them, my queen?” And Eve humbly answered: “I am.” “Who will prepare the food, oh my joy?” And Eva still answered: “I am.” Who will sew a dress, wash my clothes, caress me, decorate my home? Answer the questions, my friend! “I... I...” Eva said quietly, “I... I...” She said the famous seven “I’s.” This is how a family appeared on earth. At the wedding today I drink my glass To you, young people, to your family!
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So that your life works out, so that love always lives, so that you don’t know quarrels and troubles, For this, I will drink to the bottom!
So that adversity recedes, So that you can handle everything, So that you appreciate each other, I want to wish you happiness!
For the wedding, for love, for joy, For your future children, For dreams to come true, So that there is no sadness, gray days!
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In order to live in love and harmony until the silver wedding, the wife must have a golden character, and the husband must have iron endurance. So let's drink to the reliable alloy of two metals, to the merging of the souls of the newlyweds!
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I wish for you that immediately after your wedding you will be attacked. Let desire and passion attack you on a dark, dark night. And you will never be able to fight them off!
And Ton Pavlovich Chekhov wrote: “In family life, the most important screw is love, sexual desire, one flesh, everything else is unreliable and boring, no matter how cleverly one calculates.” I propose a toast to the “most important screw” in your life - to your love!
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dear children! You are now one family, You are responsible for each other, You are the crew of the ship.
Your ship has already been built, the wind beats in the sails, and none of you is free to make decisions for yourself.
So that there is always a supply of provisions on your ship, so that on damp, evil weekdays. The light of love in you has not gone out.
There are no complaints about the table, Only the wine let us down, We were told in confidence: It’s too bitter!
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Cool congratulations on your wedding day in verse
Congratulations to the newlyweds in Prose
Modern adaptations of Wedding songs
Funny Wedding Day cards
Beautiful cards Happy Wedding Day Animated cards Happy Wedding Day
Happy Wedding Day Pictures with Wishes
Cool funny toasts for a wedding
We want to wish you wisdom and patience. Let marriage from now on be as sweet as jam. Drive away all enemies like flies with a newspaper. Let the family shine like a bright comet! Say goodbye to freedom: Ringed now. Your total income is the window, the table, and the door. But now you share both sadness and grief. And love and kisses! Let's drink to the young people! Congratulations on your magical day! May you be lucky in all matters! There will be a house in the Maldives and a good bank account. We congratulate you on your wedding and wish you from the bottom of our hearts. Don't swear, don't swear - we're all good at this. They say that only a wise man is able to admit a mistake, only a strong man can ask for forgiveness, and only a loving one can forgive. May you always have enough love, strength and wisdom. The sages say that the more expensive and more often a husband buys gifts for his wife, the more valuable she becomes to him. We would like to wish the bride to become a real jewel for the groom. One day my wife had to go on a business trip. In the house she left many different notes for her husband: on the sugar bowl “I love you”, on the computer “Pay for the Internet”, in the closet “Where are you going to go without me in a white shirt?” So here is my toast to the wise wives who know how to predict everything. One gangster had a dream to commit a grand bank robbery and leave his mother-in-law's fingerprints there! Only a bad son-in-law can have such thoughts about his mother-in-law. I propose to drink to the groom, who will become a good son-in-law for a wonderful mother-in-law. They say that a persistent husband always gets what his wife wants. I raise a glass to ensure that the aspirations of our dear groom always coincide with the desires of the bride, and there is an opportunity to make them come true. Dear bride and groom, never forget - one drop of understanding can replace a liter of valerian
Original short wishes for newlyweds
Dear bride and groom, never forget - one drop of understanding can replace a liter of valerian.
Let everything in your family life be in its place: the keys to the Mercedes in the husband’s pocket, the mink coat on the wife’s shoulders, and the dirty socks in the laundry basket.
Let your married life be like good champagne, bright, sparkling, so that you always want more and never have a headache.
We wish you amazing and magnificent love, capable of forgiving men's stupidities, understanding women's logic and coping with children's pranks.
I suggest raising a glass to heaviness and lightness. May your pockets always be heavy with money, and may your soul be light and joyful with love.
Let your life be like a fairy tale in which you will be the king and queen. And let no evil spells become an obstacle on your path.
Short and funny toasts will help you congratulate the newlyweds at the wedding in a fun way, show humor and wit, without dragging out your speech. After all, the main thing in a congratulation is the content, not the number of words spoken.
Poetic congratulations-toasts
- If your friends consider you a “soulful and recognized joker,” then, of course, they will be happy to hear funny toasts from you for a wedding or wedding anniversary.
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Dear friend! I always discouraged you from getting married, but today it’s too late. No need! Your wife is the best! Bitterly!
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I raise my glass to your financial well-being! And let everything in your family always be equal: if you buy a tie for your husband, then for your wife you must buy a fur coat!
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Dear friend! I wish you that your wife turned out to be not just the one with whom you can live, but the only one without whom it is impossible to live!
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Getting married at your young age is like leaving a cool party at 9 pm. Let's drink so that you never regret it!
