We present to you a selection of wedding toasts and parables in your own words, in prose! When going to a wedding, don’t expect to sit behind the toastmaster. His task: to lead the wedding, giving words to everyone. An experienced toastmaster will lure you out of the farthest corner and force you to give a speech. Prepare it in advance.
Toast parables
Once upon a time there lived a wise old man.
He loved children and spent a lot of time with them. He also loved to give them gifts, but for some reason he most often gave them fragile things. No matter how hard the children tried to be careful, their new toys often broke. The children were upset and crying. Some time passed, the sage again gave them toys, even more beautiful, interesting, but still fragile. One day his parents could not stand it and told him: “You are wise and wish only the best for our children.” But why do you give them such gifts? They try their best, but the toys still break and the children cry. But the toys are so beautiful that it’s impossible not to play with them. “Very few years will pass,” the elder smiled, “and someone will give them his heart.” Maybe the skills of caution that they will acquire will help them handle this priceless gift at least a little more carefully. For sensitive memory, vigilance for the extreme fragility of human relationships! For the lifelong safety of this precious crystal even with its most active use in life. We will fill and empty these vessels, ring, moving them, when announcing the next toast! Well, if you happen to break one by accident, exclaim in unison: “Fortunately. " One young man wanted to get married successfully and looked for a bride for a long, long time. He shot from a bow, and the arrow fell near a small slender frog. He brought her home, washed her, and she turned into a pretty girl - natural blonde, long legs, everything about her. And then all the young men began to catch themselves frogs in huge quantities, so that they would have plenty to choose from. and those with a penchant for fat girls also caught toads. But, alas, they all became not only pretty girls, but even completely unsuitable for this. and as a result, frogs hatched and mosquitoes multiplied. So let’s drink to the host of the program “In the Animal World”, and to ensuring that no mating epidemics disturb the ecology of the flora and fauna around us!
One day a woman had a dream that the Lord God was standing behind the store counter. - God! It's you? - she exclaimed with joy. “Yes, it’s me,” God answered. - What can I buy from you? - the woman asked. “You can buy everything from me,” came the answer. - In that case, please give me health, happiness, love, success and a lot of money. God smiled benevolently and went into the utility room to get the ordered goods. After a while he returned with a small paper box. - And it's all?! - exclaimed the surprised and disappointed woman. “Yes, that’s all,” God answered. “Didn’t you know that my store only sells seeds?” So let's drink to our groom, who today received his seed, from which he will grow his happiness, love and success!
Khoja Nasreddin’s friend, seeing his wife for the first time, who was bald, lame, deaf and stuttered, exclaimed in horror: “Khoja, how could you marry this woman?!” She's bald! - Where will I get money for hair dye every month? - But she’s limping! - But she doesn’t need new boots! - But this woman is deaf! - He won’t hear too much! - Yes, but she stutters! “How picky you are,” Khoja got angry. - Do you want her to not have a single flaw? So let's raise our glasses to loving men who turn women's shortcomings into advantages!
A moment before his birth, the child asked the Lord: “I don’t know why I am going into this world.” What should I do? - I will give you an angel who will always be by your side. He will explain everything to you. - But how can I understand him, because I don’t know his language? - The angel will teach you his language. He will protect you from all troubles. - How and when should I return to you? - Your angel will tell you everything. - What is the name of my angel? “It doesn’t matter what his name is, he has many names.” You will call him "Mom". For the divine angel! For mother!
Once a jackal came to a lion and invited him to fight. Leo didn't pay any attention to him. Then the jackal threatened him: “If you don’t fight me, then I will go and tell all the animals that the lion, the king of animals, was terribly afraid of me.” The lion thought and answered in a majestic tone: “And let them better condemn me for cowardice than despise me for a humiliating fight with a jackal!” So let's drink to always being lions and never humiliating ourselves before unworthy jackals!
A girl and a guy were friends. They dated for a long time until they realized that they loved each other, and then they decided to get married. Only the guy set the following condition: once a year he will leave for one day. The girl thought and agreed. Soon they got married and began to live happily and cheerfully. But once a year my husband went somewhere for exactly one day. At first the young wife was not very worried about this, but then, several years later, she finally decided to follow him. And then the day came when the husband was about to leave again. He went, and his wife followed. The husband goes to the forest and the wife goes to the forest, the husband goes to the field and the wife goes there too. The husband approached the tubercle, turned into a creeping reptile and began to hiss. Let's drink to the fact that our husbands hiss only once a year, and then in an open field.
There is a well-known story in India of a girl who passed by the place where the Believer was offering his prayers; and the law says that no one should pass where a person is praying. When the girl walked back, the man said to her: “How impudent!” Do you know what you did? - What did I do? - the girl asked. And the man explained to her. “I didn’t mean to cause any harm,” said the girl. “But tell me, what do you mean by ‘praying’?” “For me, prayer is thinking about God,” said the man. - Ooo! - she said. “I was going to meet my fiancé and I was only thinking about him, about my beloved, and that’s why I didn’t see you.” But if you thought about God, how did you see me? For praying when there is no double vision on your mind!
Once upon a time there lived a dove and a dove, and they loved each other. One day a dove sent his little dove to visit her parents for three days. On the way back, a storm caught her, and shook her, and beat the dove, hurt her, crippled her wings. On wounded wings, she somehow flew home late. And the dove waited for her, waited, got jealous, became furious and, without allowing her to say a word, pecked her. The great Spinoza said: “Do not rush to condemn, hurry to understand.” For this great truth!
Voice greeting to create a festive mood for a woman
Everyone can afford this option, because it is budget-friendly, original and always appropriate. Women love with their ears and congratulations over the phone are no less sweet and pleasant to their ears. Our selection of voice messages is impressively diverse – from humorous to lyrical. There is something special for every birthday girl at any age, and she can receive it right during the feast or early in the morning, before preparing for the celebration. When to send a musical greeting is up to you. As well as accepting words of gratitude from the amazed culprit of the joyful event!
One day, a swallow with her little chicks was fleeing from predators and found herself on the edge of a deep mountain gorge. And the first chick began to ask: - Mommy, carry me, and I will always love you! - You're lying! - said the swallow and threw him into the abyss. - Mom, move me, and I will save you someday too! - said the second chick. - You're lying! - said the swallow and also threw him into the abyss. And the third chick said: “Mom, save me, and when I grow up, I will also save my children!” “But you’re telling the truth,” said the swallow and saved him. So let's drink to the bitter truth!
One old man had two sons. Before his death, he bequeathed to them to divide the remaining inheritance in half. The brothers did not get along during the division and invited their neighbor to resolve their dispute. -What did your father punish you? “He ordered everything to be divided in half,” answered the disputants. - Well, divide: tear all the clothes in half, break each bowl in half, cut the livestock and poultry. His stupid brothers listened and were left with nothing. Let's drink to the fact that we divide everything not in half, but fairly.
One woman gave birth to a child. Everyone is good, but there is one drawback - instead of a navel, there is a nut. The poor woman has shown it to every doctor and no one can help. And then she heard from good people that there was a sorcerer in a remote village - he could help her grief. A woman came to the sorcerer and asked for help. The sorcerer gave her a magic wrench. She came home, unscrewed the nut from her son’s belly button and her son’s ass fell off. So let’s drink to not looking for adventures on your ass!
One day a baby camel asks his mother: “Mom, look at how slender and thin the horse’s legs are, but why do we have such crooked legs?” “But we’ll walk through the desert, but the horse won’t be able to, it’ll get stuck.” “Mom, look how straight the horse’s teeth are, but why are ours so crooked and bent, and saliva flowing all the time?” “But we can eat thorns in the desert, but a horse cannot.” “Mom, look how smooth and beautiful the horse’s back is, but why is that hanging out there?” “But we can survive in the desert for two weeks without water, but a horse cannot.” - Mom, why the hell do we need all this at the zoo? So let's drink to survive in our zoo!
The bull complained to the donkey: “I’m disappointed in cows: lazy, fat, stupid...” “Perhaps I’ll be disappointed in cows too,” answered the donkey. - Why do you? - the bull was surprised. “You see, if I’m disappointed in people, I’ll get hit on the spine, and if I’m disappointed in cows, then it’s quite safe... Friends, I suggest we drink so that we never give up on people!”
A long time ago, when God had just created the earth, reptiles and creatures of the earth, he began to give them age. A monkey, a donkey, a dog and a man came to God. God gave the monkey 15 years of life. Donkey awarded the 20th. He gave the dog 10 years. When a man came to him, God said to him: “And you, man, will live 20 years.” “How can that be?” the man was indignant. - After all, I am the king of nature, and I will live almost like a monkey - give me more. “Okay,” God agreed. - I will give you more years of life, but know that for the first 15 years you will live like a monkey - you will make faces and imitate, for the next 25 years you will live your time - a human one, then, like a donkey, 20 years you will have to live with your hump and then earn your living, and the last 10 years you will live like an old, mangy dog that snaps and tries to preserve the property it has acquired. We are now at human age, so God grant that we may live the entire age allotted to us as human beings! Let's drink to that!
A strange monkey came to the monkey herd and asked to spend the night. “Spend the night,” said the leader, “but remember, according to our laws, there should be no extra ones in the herd, so you must leave in the morning.” In the morning, the leader counted the herd and announced: “She didn’t leave.” Therefore, according to our laws, we must eat it. Ate it. “You ate the wrong one,” admitted the alien monkey. “It doesn’t matter,” said the leader, “the main thing is to comply with the law!” I propose to drink to strict observance of the laws!
Avdey, a serf, lived with his master in service. He lived to a ripe old age. Then one day a master comes to him and asks: “Tell me, Avdey, how did you live your life, were you happy in life?” - How did I live? He lived an ordinary life, he wasn’t afraid of work, he didn’t sin, he wasn’t happy, thank God... I suggest we drink so that we too can live normally! And happiness will come to us on its own!
A man walks through the hot desert and sees a wanderer lying dying of thirst. The wanderer asks him: “Oh, give me, good man, a sip of water. Save me." But the man replied that he himself needed water, and moved on. He walked a fair distance and thought: “What a bad thing I did: I didn’t give the dying man a sip of water.” And he hurried back. But it was too late: the wanderer had already died without waiting for mercy. Let's drink to helping on time - when they ask, and not when we want to give, but there is no one left.
The husband and wife were captured by the natives. They tied them to a tree and staged ritual dances around them. The husband suspected trouble: “I have the impression that we have ended up with cannibals,” he says to his wife, “they are probably going to eat us!” - Darling, as always, you only think about food! So that no one gets the impression that we think only about food, I suggest... a drink!
One wise old Georgian said: If you want to be happy for one day, get drunk. If you want to be happy for one week, get sick. If you want to be happy for one month, get married. If you want to be happy for one year, take a mistress. And if you want to be happy all your life, be healthy, dear! So let's drink to the happiness of everyone present - to health!
Wise toast in verse
My toast is for pride, for name and family, City, village and all our people, Pride for mother, for sister, for wife, Pride for brother, father! For the country! Really, there is something to be proud of in Russia: The capital has become younger and more beautiful, And under Stopudov’s castle the border, Like a queen, is any girl! Simple people would not be able to fill themselves with melon: Pride cannot be confused with a vice - pride! I also drink because I am proud of you. All of you, friends and loved ones, are great!!!
Beautiful wise toast
The more we search for the meaning of life, the less of it there is in our lives. And vice versa. By rejecting the meaning of life, we fill our lives with more meaning. So let’s not look for adventures on our own heads!
A wise toast in your own words
One smart person said: “Nothing shortens life more than the distance between toasts.” Let's drink to living as long as possible!
Wise toast parable
One man had daughters all the time, and he dreamed of having a son. Everyone considered it their duty to give the unlucky father some advice. They advised him so much that he finally got angry and said: “Stop it, after listening to your advice, I forgot how to do what I knew how to do.” So let's drink to having your head on your shoulders and going your own way!
A short wise toast
Man is amazingly structured - he is upset when he loses wealth, and is indifferent to the fact that the days of his life are irrevocably passing away. Let's drink to the meaning of life!
The best wise toast
Life has limits, it is short, but dreams are limitless. You yourself are walking along the road, but your dream is already at home. You yourself go to your beloved, and the dream is already in her arms. You yourself are living now, but your dream is already many years ahead. She flies further than the line where life ends in darkness. So let's drink to the dream that prolongs our lives!
Toast “The Legend of Icarus”
You all know the legend of Icarus.
A long time ago, Icarus lived in the world. And he dreamed of flying like a bird. Icarus made himself wings from feathers and broke away from the sinful earth. He decided to rise above the trees - and rose. I wanted to fly higher than the mountains - and I took off. Then Icarus wanted to fly higher than the Sun, rose high, high almost to the Sun itself, but the wax that held the feathers melted, Icarus fell to the ground and broke.
I want to wish our birthday boy that everything he dreams of comes true, that he conquers any heights and that no matter how high he rises, full text→
Toast about real friends
One man had a birthday, for which all his friends gathered. They were sitting at the table and drinking, when the father of this birthday boy unexpectedly came. He told him that he was in a hurry to get to him and knocked the man down. And he's dead and lying in his trunk. Then the father told his son to convey this news to those present, and maybe then they would help him get rid of the dead body. The guy told his friends, and they immediately had something to do and got ready to leave. Everyone left, but the girl of this guy (the birthday boy) remained, she loved him very much. And there is still a best friend left.
Once upon a time, God gave a man twenty-five years to live, and a horse, a dog, a monkey and all other animals fifty years. The man was offended, but God decided so.
A man went to the animals so that they would give him a part of their life. This is how it happened that for twenty-five years a person lives like a person, for the next twenty-five years he plows like a horse, then he lives like a dog, and then for the next twenty-five. for years they laugh at him like he’s a monkey.
So let's drink to the fact that our birthday boy will live at least another hundred years as a human being! Happy birthday full text→
The ancient Greeks believed that human destiny had its own goddesses. They were called Moira. Initially, it was believed that each person has his own moira. Then the number of these goddesses was reduced to three: Atropos, Clotho and Lachesis. A person’s whole life was connected with them. They were imagined as old women. Lachesis sets the lot even before birth, Clotho spins the thread of fate, Atropos inevitably brings the future closer and, cutting the thread, ends life.
So, dear hero of the occasion! I wish that Clotho would spin your thread of life strong and thick, Lachesis would guard your happy lot, helping you get past life’s sharp corners and labyrinths, and Atropos’s scissors would become dull, full text→
Parables about husband and wife
The word "spouses" comes from Ancient Greece. It is translated as “ox team.” After all, in fact, the spouses, like a pair of oxen in one harness, will walk along the difficult path of life towards sunny happiness. And let success never leave them, and let the number constantly increase. And this toast will be remembered by young people for many years.
This parable is no less interesting: there is a month and the sun in the sky, and the young are with us. They are as brilliant and wonderful as the luminaries. But if the luminaries appear in the sky one by one, our young ones will always be together. Together they will light the way for themselves and their children, and will never be separated.
Young people will also be pleased with funny toasts. One married couple lived to be 75 years old and celebrated a diamond wedding. When they were asked how they did it, the couple replied that it was all about the small bed. It was on it that they slept for all seventy-five years. It is worth making a wedding toast to a single bed, which helps brighten up the life of a married couple.
Another old parable says that one very rich man had a young and beautiful wife. And then one day he began to complain to a friend that his life was boring. The friend was very surprised, because this man had everything, his life was like sweet molasses. The rich man invited him to visit for several days and ordered the cook to serve only cakes for breakfast, lunch and dinner. Towards the end of the second day, the friend begged to be served meat or something salty. The rich man grinned at this and said: “You see how quickly the sweets become boring!” So let the life of this couple always be with zest and pepper, but without bitterness.
Caucasian toasts, parables, jokes for a woman’s anniversary.
In addition to beautiful lyrical congratulations and wishes in poetry and prose, the anniversary feast is very decorated with appropriately told table anecdotes, table jokes, Caucasian toasts and parables.
A toastmaster or a guest who wants to make a beautiful toast to a birthday woman, when choosing the main direction of the congratulation: emphasizing her personal merits or just a joke to cheer everyone up, should be guided by the character of the hero of the occasion. The suggested Caucasian toasts, parables, and jokes for a woman's anniversary: lyrical and humorous - are more suitable for a friendly feast on the occasion of the holiday with a friendly and mature lady.
Caucasian toast for the anniversary “To a real woman!”
I think everyone will agree with me that our dear hero of the day is a real woman! Listen to the definition given to real women by true connoisseurs. They say that if God wanted to create a woman who would be superior to a man, he would create her from a piece of his head. If God wanted to make her a man's slave, he would have created her from a leg. But since woman was created from Adam’s rib, God conceived her to be equal to man, that is, he wanted her to be his friend and advisor. So let's drink to a real woman and faithful friend... (name)!
Caucasian toast to the hero of the day “Age of the Goddess”
In the Caucasus, it is believed that a woman's life can be divided into seven stages: baby, girl, girl, beautiful woman, blooming woman, stunning woman and goddess. Looking at our hero of the day, any Caucasian sage would say that she is a goddess not by age, but by definition! So let our birthday girl always be a goddess in the eyes of men!
3. Parable for a woman’s anniversary “About age.”
One young man really wanted to get married. The family searched for a candidate for a long time, and finally the family found him the best woman, as it seemed to them. But the young man said that he would ask only one question about this woman: how old is she? The relatives replied that they had asked her, but the lady replied that she had forgotten how old she was. “It’s clear,” answered the newly made groom, “this woman is over forty, because all women over forty somehow suddenly forget their age!” And the sage answered him: “A wise woman forgets her age because a real man doesn’t need to know it, the main thing is not how old she is, but how old she feels!” So let's drink to our hero of the day, forever young at heart!
4. Parable “Don’t drink raw water”
A woman is the wisest creature on earth. She is so wise that any hundred-year-old snake could envy her intelligence. Let me tell you a parable about one of these women, who from the very beginning of her marriage told her husband not to drink raw water. But he continued, and then one day a misfortune happened to him on the river, he began to drown. A husband chokes in the river and blows bubbles, and his wise wife wails on the shore: “I told you: don’t drink raw water, it’s a disaster!” Let's drink: to women's wisdom, and to the fact that we will never have to drink water while there is wine!
5. Parable on a woman’s anniversary “About what can and cannot be forgotten”
Old people in the Caucasus tell the following parable: a thousand years ago, their region was ruled by an old and very wise prince, for his justice and intelligence, God gave him a wonderful son - handsome, healthy, and dexterous. His noble name was George, but George had one drawback - he quickly forgot everything that happened to him.
The prince wanted to marry George, but the young man forgot any girl within five minutes, no matter how beautiful she was. The prince was very sad that he couldn’t get his son married, but he so wanted to see and nurse his grandchildren! Then George decided to travel around the world until he found a girl whom he would remember under any circumstances. On the way, the prince gave his son an elegant necklace with the words: “When you, my son, find a woman and love her, give her this necklace. And then you will be able to remember her, no matter what happens!”
Table wisdom - “For beautiful stupidity!”
Sages have long wondered why God endowed women with both beauty and stupidity? And only one hundred-year-old aksakal managed to find the answer to this: God created them beautiful so that men would fall in love with them, and gave them stupidity so that they would reciprocate! Let us praise this beautiful stupidity and insane beauty today!
Joke for the feast “For the unsurpassed hostess!”
One woman was once asked what her job was. - Soloist! – she answered proudly. — And where can I hear you sing? “I’m not a singer, but an expert in pickling cabbage, cucumbers and tomatoes!” ... My toast to the birthday girl, who is a wonderful soloist and an unsurpassed hostess!
Anniversary toast at the feast “To culinary talents!”
I would like to support the conversation about the talents of today’s hero of the day with the following anecdote: a husband returns from the hospital and tells his wife: “Don’t eat anything today, the doctor recommended that I sleep on an empty stomach!” Let's raise a glass to the culinary talents of today's birthday girl, who never allows her husband to go to bed hungry or his wife to go hungry!
Comic toast “To the health of the birthday girl!”
One day, two elderly friends were walking down the street and met a doctor. One of them hid behind the other. - What's happened? – his friend asked. - Yes, something became somehow uncomfortable. After all, I have never had the opportunity to get sick and seek help from a doctor. So let's drink to the birthday girl always being ashamed in front of doctors for the same reason! For health!
Wise parable “About the ingenuity of women”
17. “For the generosity of our birthday girl!”
God once said: “Whatever you take from people, you will be left without.
And what you give to them will be returned to you threefold.” Let's drink to how generous our birthday girl is, who spares nothing for her friends! 18. Comic toast “To women!”
A passionate young Caucasian man wooed a lovely girl. She answered “yes,” but set the condition that once a year she would leave home until morning for a day. The guy in love agreed. For a whole year the couple were absolutely happy. This went on for ten years, but one day the husband could not resist and became curious about where his beloved wife was going. He followed her and was extremely surprised that his wife climbed high into the mountains, turned into a snake and hissed all day long... Men, let’s drink to the women who turn into snakes once a year, so that their husbands don’t see or hear it!
