Funny fairy tales

Humor in folk tales is an integral part of folklore. Funny fairy tales will help not only cheer up, but also distract from routine activities for both adults and children. In them, adults and peers of the young reader, animals and birds find themselves in ridiculous situations. In addition to laughter, these works will unobtrusively teach children the ability to dream, empathize, notice and use wordplay in their speech. Read with pleasure, laugh and rejoice with your favorite characters!

Cones

Mikhail Plyatskovsky

The puppy Yelp lay in his booth and watched as the kid Marmeladik and the calf Rogalik played. And they played like this: they would run up to a pine tree, hit the trunk with their heads as hard as they could, and the cones would fall off the branches. The one who shot down the most wins.

Tyavka couldn’t stand it, he got out of the booth and went up to his friends.

- And I want to play with you. Do you accept?

“We don’t feel sorry,” said Rogalik.

- We accept! - Marmeladik said.

The kid knocked down five cones. Calf - as many as ten.

The puppy rushed towards the pine tree - and how he moved his head along the trunk with a running start. Even sparks fell from his eyes.

- Oh? Hurt! – he whined. Then the puppy Tyavka touched his head with his paw and asked his friends:

- Please look at what jumped up on my head...

Little goat Marmeladik says to him:

- Eh, we completely forgot that you have no horns at all!

And the calf Rogalik licked the puppy with his tongue and said with a sigh:

- You have... - a bump. One, but my own... And although I have ten, they are all pine. So don't worry and don't be upset?

Who will speak first

The old man and the old woman became so lazy that one day they argued about who should wash the pot. They decided that this would be done by the one who uttered a word first. Read with your children from the fairy tale who will lose their temper first and why. She teaches hard work, wisdom, reasonable actions, the ability to make concessions to loved ones, and condemns pride and stubbornness.

Once upon a time there lived an old man and an old woman. Lazy and lazy. They transferred all kinds of work to one another. They need to lock the hut with a hook by nightfall - they are having an argument.

- You should lock it.

- No, for you.

Unlocking it in the morning is another argument.

- Unlock it for you.

- No, for you. I locked it yesterday.

So they decided to cook porridge. After arguments and discord, the old woman cooked a pot of porridge. They sat down, ate porridge, they needed to wash the pot. The old man and the old woman began to argue again. The old woman says.

- I cooked porridge, and you need to wash the pot.

“No,” says the old man. Since you cooked, you should wash it. But I have never washed pots in my life and will never wash them.

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Funny fairy tales for adults
Here is a selection of non-children's and not quite folk tales

Sponsor of a good mood - humor and positivity (section) - live cheerfully!

01. People's deputy fairy tale “Amendment”

In the thirtieth reading, in the thirtieth reading, the deputy composed an amendment.
A big, big amendment came out. The deputy began to push her through. He votes and votes, but he can’t push through. The centrist deputy called. The centrists are for the deputy, the deputy is for the amendment - they vote and vote, but they cannot pass it. The centrists called the farmers. The farmers are for the centrists, the centrists are for the deputy, the deputy is for the amendment - they vote and vote - they cannot accept it. The agrarians called the Social Democrats. Social Democrats are for the agrarians, the agrarians are for the centrists, the centrists are for the deputy, the deputy is for the amendment - they vote and vote - they cannot accept it. The Social Democrats called the national patriots. And they called the right, and the right called the left. The left for the right, the right for the left, the ultra-right for the ultra-left, the national patriots for the social democrats, the social democrats for the agrarians, the agrarians for the centrists, the centrists for the deputy, the deputy for the amendment - they vote and vote - they cannot accept it. But then a single-mandate member came out of the buffet. He ran past, pressed the button - the amendment was accepted! 02. Folk youth tale about an old woman and unisex.
Pinocchio was walking through the forest, he saw a hut, and in the hut an old woman lay with a mustache and big eyes. “Listen, Granny, why are your eyes so big?” - asks Pinocchio. “And this is to see you better,” the old woman answers. “Hey, grandma, why is your mustache so big? Why can’t you get it out?” - asks Pinocchio. “But this is none of your business, Little Red Riding Hood!” - the old woman answers. “You’re a hat yourself,” Pinocchio was offended, “it’s a fashionable striped cap!” And the old woman threw off the blanket and turned out to be a wolf, and how she growled: “I’ll eat you, girl!” And grab Pinocchio with your teeth! And the teeth broke on the tree. The moral of the story is simple: nowadays fashion is unisex, everyone wears the same thing. Therefore, do not rush to harass girls; if you run into a guy, you may end up without teeth.

03. A fairy tale of the peoples of Africa about an old man and a golden piranha.

There lived an old man and an old woman near Lake Chad.
The old man went fishing. The first time I threw in curare poison, only toads surfaced. The second time I threw curare poison - only crocodiles surfaced. The third time I threw the poison curare - the Golden Piranha surfaced and wanted to say, let me go older, I will fulfill three cherished wishes, but I could not, because I was paralyzed. The old man returned to the old woman with the prey, the old woman was delighted, they salted the toads for the winter, they dried the crocodiles for the summer, and instantly ate the Golden Piranha straight raw. So all three wishes came true by themselves. 04. Folk legend of the Australian aborigines “The Frog Princess”.

The shaman had three sons.
The time has come for them to get married. The older one threw a boomerang - the boomerang hit the daughter of a white missionary. The middle son threw a boomerang - the boomerang hit the daughter of the tribal leader. And the younger one threw a boomerang - it didn’t hit anyone, the boomerang returned to him. So he remained a bachelor, although there were toads and frogs around in incredible numbers. 05. Finnish folk tale “The Three Chipmunks”.
Once upon a time there were three chipmunk brothers in the Finnish forest.
Nif-nifkola, Nuf-nufkola and Naf-nafkola. They decided to build a Finnish bathhouse. Nif-nifkola went to the swamp to pick reeds. Nuf-nufkolla went to the clearing to collect brushwood, and Naf-nafkolla went down to the stream to collect stones. Winter has come. The brothers froze, returned to the hole and slept until spring. And so every year, in winter and summer, if a tourist hears rustling in the forest, he knows that these are chipmunks snoring in a hole or standing in a bannnu... 06. Japanese folk tale “Cinderella-chan”.
A long time ago, there lived a girl named Cinderella-chan on the Kuril Islands.
One day, the segan of the Kuril Islands announced a kumite competition, but the evil stepmother did not let Cinderella-chan in. Then the Fairy flew in and said: Cinderella-chan, here is a silk kimono for you, here is a cart with a rickshaw and here are nunchucks for you, ride a kumite, but remember - at midnight the cart will turn into a grain of rice, the rickshaw into a bamboo pole, the kimono into a mat, and nunchucks into a katana sword and will give you hara-kiri. Cinderella-chan went to a kumite competition, defeated everyone with her karate skills, but at midnight the prophecy came true and the nunchucks gave her hara-kiri. Unable to bear the shame, the fairy committed hara-kiri for herself, the stepmother committed hara-kiri, and the segan committed hara-kiri. And behind them, all the inhabitants of the Kuril Islands made themselves hara-kiri... Then the islands were gradually populated by Russian fishermen. 07. A tale of the peoples of the United States about a wooden stool.
In one American city there lived a talking stool, worked as a courier, and delivered pizza.
One day journalists pestered her, telling her where you are from? The stool refused as best she could, but in the end she gave in and told her story. Papa Carlo lived in a closet, and one day they brought him a piece of wood. In a fairy tale, he would definitely plan Pinocchio, but in life he has to feed his family. I planed the stool and sold it at the market. And the fact that the stool suddenly learned to walk and talk depends greatly on the type of wood, and nothing else. 08. African folk tale about grandfather, woman and the ostrich Ryaba.

There lived a grandfather and a woman in the same African tribe, and they had an ostrich, Ryaba.
One day he hid his head in the sand. The grandfather of the ostrich began to dig up Ryaba - he digs and digs, but cannot dig it up. The grandfather called the woman, they dug and dug, but they couldn’t dig it out. The woman called the shaman, the shaman called the tapir, the tapir called the lemur, and the lemur called the mongoose. They dig, but they can’t dig it up. Then a white missionary came with a shovel, digging and digging, and suddenly dug up a nugget, but not an ordinary one, but a gold one. And they built a stone church in the village, and lived in it happily ever after and died one day from an earthquake. 09. Folk medical tale about Pyotr Petrovich Ivanko.
Once upon a time there lived a stepmother with her daughters, and she had a worker, Cinderella.
The stepmother and her daughters left for the ball, but did not take Cinderella. Then the Fairy flew in and said to Cinderella: here is a golden carriage for you, here are black horses for you, here is a white dress for you. Go to the ball, but don’t stay late - at exactly midnight the dress will turn into a straitjacket, the carriage into a ward, and the horses into psychiatrists. Cinderella went to the ball, but stayed late. As soon as I jumped into the carriage, the clock struck. She opens her eyes - and all around is a psychiatric ward and orderlies in dressing gowns, she looked at herself in the mirror - instead of a dress, she was wearing a straitjacket, and she was no longer Cinderella, but some guy with a mustache - Pyotr Petrovich Ivanko. This true story was written down from his words. 10. Australian folk tale "Boomerang".
There lived a grandfather and a woman in the jungle.
The woman whittled a boomerang, and it flew out of the threshold of the hut and flew into the jungle. And towards him is a marsupial wolf. “Boomerang-boomerang, I’ll eat you!” And the boomerang replies: “I left my grandmother, I left my grandfather, and I’ll leave you!” He hit the wolf on the forehead and flew on. I'll meet a koala bear. The boomerang hit him on the forehead and flew on. And towards the kangaroo. The boomerang hit him too and flew back to his grandparents. I, he says, left my grandmother and my grandfather and the wolf, the koala and the kangaroo, and I will leave you! “So we are grandparents!” - the old men shouted, but the boomerant hit them on the forehead and flew in a circle again. It just flies, the piece of wood has no brains at all. 11. Central Black Earth folk tale about Ivan the Fool and the magic sword.
Ivan and the Serpent went to fight.
He is driving through the forest, and a wolf meets him. Only Ivan pulled out his sword, and the sword begged in a human voice - don’t be stupid to me, Ivanushka, I will still be useful to you. There is nothing to do, Ivan hid his sword, drove on, and a bear met him. Ivan took out his sword, and the sword said again - don’t be stupid to me, Ivanushka, I’ll be useful to you! Ivan let go of the bear, drove on, drove out into an open field, and lo and behold, the Serpent himself was rushing towards him. Ivan took up the sword, and he again: don’t dull me, Ivanushka, I will be useful to you, I will serve you with faith and truth. Ivan didn’t listen to him, he swung his arms and the Snake struck! This is where the sword ends. And soon it will be the end for Ivan. I would have listened to good advice, gone to alternative service and plowed my native peaceful land with a sword. 12. Folk commercial tale about Papa Carlo.
One day Signor Giuseppe came to Papa Carlo’s closet, brought a log of wood and ordered a stool to be planed.
Papa Carlo looked at the log, scratched the back of his head, and thought - it’s not creative work to plan a stool, but let me plan a little man and call him Pinocchio. No sooner said than done. Signor Giuseppe came a week later, is my stool ready, he says? And dad Carlo smiles, Pinocchio hands it to him. Signor Giuseppe was offended, filed a lawsuit, and Papa Carlo had to sell the closet to pay the penalty. Moral: do what the customer wants, not your left foot. 13. A modern Russian fairy tale about Cinderella and a night disco.
Cinderella went to a nightclub.
She's hanging out with the prince on the dance floor, she feels incredibly good, but suddenly she feels - betrayal, twelve! She rushed to the exit as fast as she could, ran out into the street, looked at her motorcycle, and the motorcycle turned into a pumpkin! She looks at herself and turns into a nightstand! He looks at the nightclub - and the nightclub turns into a police station! Then the prince ran out of the club - what’s wrong with you, Cinderella? But she can’t utter a word, she just hums and shows on her fingers - twelve! The prince was no fool, he understood everything, put Cinderella in his Zhiguli and took her away with mineral water to drink it off, and after two days she was released. Because twelve ecstasy tablets are such an unrealistic overdose that it’s possible to say goodbye to reality! 14. Russian folk tale about faith in people.
Once they invited Pinocchio to a school party to tell the children about life.
Buratino told how his dad Carlo cut a log from a log - the children believed it. He told about the turtle Tortilla, the golden key and the secret door in Papa Carlo’s closet - the children believed it. But as soon as he began to tell how Lenin carried him in his arms, the children did not believe it, whistled, laughed and spat chewing gum on Pinocchio, although this is also true. This happened before he was born, during a cleanup day. 15. A fairy tale of the peoples of Chukotka about Red Ushanka, her grandmother and fish oil.
However, there lived a girl in the distant tundra and her name was Red Ushanka.
One day my mother baked a basket of seal oil, heated a can of fish oil and said: take it to my grandmother, who lives beyond the tundra. You'll have just enough time during the night, it's a polar night. Red Ushanka put on her skis and ran across the tundra, singing a song about how she goes to her grandmother. (Listen to the song of the Red Ushanka tomorrow on the waves of our radio from eight in the morning to eleven in the evening.) The Arctic fox overheard this song, ran to his grandmother, swallowed it, and lay down in the middle of the tent. Red Ushanka came and asked: but grandma, why do you have such a big tail? However, in order to sweep the floor in the plague, the arctic fox answers. However, grandma, why are you so short? - asks the girl. However, I don’t even know what to answer,” says the arctic fox. And Red Ushanka looks at him and says: however, this is not a grandmother, but just some kind of arctic fox. And then she ripped open the arctic fox’s belly with ski poles and released the grandmother. And they began to live and live and drink fish oil. Because the brave and quick-witted Chukchi girl is not afraid of any arctic fox. 16. American folk tale about tough guys.

One elderly American woman warmed up a Big Mac for her husband.
And Big Mac jumped out of the microwave and rolled out of the cottage. Rolling along the highway, and a cowboy meets him: Mother of God, listen to the guy, I'll kick your ass! And Big Mac replies: I kicked an American’s ass, I kicked an American’s ass, and I’ll kick your ass! Mother of God, said the cowboy, this guy looks like he could kick my ass! - and gave way. Big Mac rolls on, and towards the Sheriff: don’t move, guy, you’re surrounded, you only have the right not to answer questions, call your lawyer, write a postcard to your cousin and draw a picture for your psychoanalyst. And Big Mac answers - I kicked an American and an American woman’s ass, I kicked a cowboy’s ass and I’ll kick yours too! Mother of God,” said the Sheriff, “I have a year left until retirement and I won’t risk my ass.” And he gave way. And Big Mac rolled on and rolled into Harlem. And since then no one has seen him. The hobos say the Harlem boys played a bad joke on him. 17. French folk tale about a kind and simple girl Cinderella.
There lived a Cinderella in one family.
She was a good housewife - she washed dishes, fed pigs, cleaned the stove, and she was also a kind soul. And so the hostess and her own daughters went to the royal ball, but as usual, she did not take Cinderella. But a fairy flew to Cinderella, gave her a dress of unprecedented beauty, crystal shoes, a golden carriage, and Cinderella went to the ball. When she walked in, everyone gasped - what kind of unprecedented beauty is this? And Cinderella, out of habit, began to laugh at the whole room, and pick her nose in front of everyone, and slurp at the buffet table and spit on the floor, and by midnight she got drunk and began to dance naked on the table - then they took her away. It's the fairy's fault. After all, in order to win respect in society, one must start not with a golden carriage, but with good manners. 18. National fairy tale about the chicken Ryaba.

Once upon a time there lived a grandfather and a woman and they had a chicken, Ryaba.
She once laid an egg, but not an ordinary one, but a golden one. The grandfather and woman began to beat the egg - the grandfather did not break it, the woman did not break it, but in the end, of course, they broke it. Then they set to work on the dishes, then broke the glass, crushed the furniture, scratched the elevator, and littered the entrance. Such an outbreak of vandalism is sometimes caused by precious objects in the hands of uncultured people. 19. Russian folk tale about the silver hoof.
There lived in the distant Carpathian mountains a little goat with a silver hoof.
And he had this property - wherever he knocked with his hoof, a ruble appeared in small change, knocked twice - the steward, knocked three times - a thousand in a bank package. And then perestroika frightened him, he began to run around the country from one end to the other. The special services, the police and the army catch him - not out of self-interest, but because each such run is twenty percent of inflation. So, if you find money on the road, take it to the central bank, it’s extra, and they will destroy it there. And if you suddenly catch this goat, then our country will rise from the crisis. 20. German folk tale about Cinderella and Thumbelina.
Cinderella went to the ball, met the prince there, but at midnight she had to run away, as the fairy ordered.
And while running away, she lost her glass slipper. The prince began to look for the girl he loved - whoever would try on the shoe of the court ladies - it was too small for everyone. He then issued a decree: I will marry the girl whose shoe fits on her foot. Signed: Prince. But before he had time to send messengers around the country, Thumbelina crawled out of the nearby burdocks. The shoe not only fit her foot, but also fit her head there. There was nothing to do, the prince had to get married, as promised. And he lived long and unhappily, because Thumbelina turned out to be angry and grumpy, and they also had problems in their marital relationship. The moral of the story is simple: you need to be careful when drafting official documents so that there are no discrepancies. 21. Folk medical tale about our little friends.

Ivan the good fellow was walking through the swamp, a damp, unkind place.
Suddenly the rubella virus comes towards him and says in a human voice: don’t eat me, Ivanushka, I’ll still be useful to you! Ivan took pity, put the virus in his bosom and moved on. And towards the jaundice virus. Don't eat me Ivanushka, you'll still need me! Ivan took pity, grabbed him by the bosom, walked on, and met the whooping cough virus. Don't eat me Ivanushka, I'll be useful to you! And Ivan took him with him. Ivan walked for a long time, briefly - he defeated Kashchei, freed the princess, hacked to death the dragon, deceived Baba Yaga, did many glorious deeds and returned home with victory - lie on a warm stove, drink fresh milk, rest from wanderings for a month or two, so that no one worried in vain. This is where rubella, jaundice and whooping cough came in handy. 22. A fairy tale of the peoples of the black earth about three witches.
Once upon a time, witches gathered for a Sabbath in a deep forest.
They gathered and argued about who could fly a broom better. One witch sat on her broom made of birch twigs and flew above the fir trees. The second witch sat down on her boar bristle mop and flew above the clouds. And the third witch sat down on her fashionable rope mop, imported. And she flew above the moon and above the stars. And what do you want: a foreign car - it’s a foreign car in the forest. 23. Folk military landing tale about sister Alyonushka and brother Ivanushka.
Sister Alyonushka said to brother Ivanushka: don’t drink water from a goat’s hoof!
Brother Ivanushka did not listen to her, drank and turned into a kid. No matter what sister Alyonushka did - she took him to hospitals, treated him with homeopathy, and turned to psychics - nothing helped. And when Ivanushka turned 18, they took him into the army. It wasn’t easy for him there at first - his colleagues teased him, the old-timers called him names. And of course, the appearance is not according to the regulations - hence the constant outfits and penalties. But still, the army made a man out of him. There's no point in scolding her. 24. A new Russian fairy tale about the battle of Vovan the hero and the Three-Headed Serpent.

In short, Vovan, the good fellow, went to fight the three-headed snake.
He drives shorter through the forest, and Baba Yaga meets him. Well, he gave her a few bucks, she showed him the way. He is driving along the road, and a pack of wolves meets him. Well, Vovan, in short, gave the leader a few bucks, and the pack left. Vovan drove out onto the field, and the field was covered with human bones. Then the horse under him began to stumble and rear up. But Vovan went to the grooms, gave him a few bucks - they tweaked the horse for something, and in short, he stopped rocking the boat. Ivan drives further, and then the earth shakes, the sky turns black, and a three-headed snake runs out. Well, he says, you, Vovan, got a lot of bucks. And every head. “It won’t happen your way, it will happen my way!” - Vovan shouted, pulled out a sword and cut off two heads. Well, I already gave the third one a few bucks and the agreement was fine. The snake tossed him home with his horse for fifty dollars. 25. German philosophical tale of the peoples of the former GDR.

The father had three sons, two smart, and the third was a policeman.
Two plowed the land and planted wheat, but the third did not plow, blew a whistle and waved a club. One day, the good Santa Claus walked by and gave everyone gifts: the older brothers had running boots, flying carpets and self-assembled tablecloths, and the policeman - an invisible cap, an invisible baton and an inaudible whistle. So, since then, the younger brother has been walking around you and me - blowing his whistle at us and beating us with a baton, but we just don’t notice it. 26. Russian folk federative tale about brave ingenuity.

The king had half a kingdom, and the rest of the kingdom belonged to his sons.
He once called them together, gave them a thick paper packet and said, “Come on, good fellows, whoever tears the packet, I’ll give him half the kingdom!” But no matter how much the sons tried to tear the pack, they couldn’t, it turned out to be too thick. Then the king untied the packet and said: if it didn’t come out completely, try one piece at a time. The sons rushed at the leaves and instantly tore the entire packet apart. So remember, the king said, three truths: what doesn’t work out right away will come out gradually, what you can’t do on your own will be done together, what you can’t do by force will be done with cunning and ingenuity. Got it? “Got it!” - the sons nodded. The king hugged his sons and laughed joyfully: “You didn’t understand anything! You just tore up your block of controlling shares and the kingdom became completely mine!” This is the end of the fairy tale, the end of the sons, and the end of the kingdom too! 27. A scary tale about a book.
In one house there was a bookcase in the children's room. There were a lot of books there. And the biggest one is red. Mom told her daughter: read all books, but don’t read the Red Book. One morning my mother comes in and there is blood on the floor and a gnawed skeleton and traces of large claws. The mother cried, buried her daughter, and at night she decided to open the Bible and pray, but she made the wrong book in the dark. In the morning the neighbor comes in and there is blood on the floor and a gnawed skeleton and shreds of fur. Then the neighbor guessed about the Red Book, called the police, and took the book away. In the evening the investigator told the duty officer: leaf through the files you want, play with the evidence you like, but don’t open the Red Book. In the morning the police come - and in the duty room there is blood and a gnawed skeleton and scales everywhere. Then the police decided to burn the book. They doused him with gasoline and set him on fire. And suddenly a multi-voiced howl was heard and unprecedented creatures and monsters, dead and dying, climbed out of the Red Book! The police shot them, beat them with rifle butts, and buried them in a hole. And they placed a stone with the inscription: “People of the Earth! Take care of rare and endangered animals! These creatures take revenge like that.”

Funny fairy tales for adults

Lord of Lords (English fairy tale)

One girl was hired to serve an eccentric elderly gentleman. He asks her:

- What will you call me?

“Master, or master, or whatever you wish, sir,” the girl answers.

“You should call me “lord of lords.” What would you call it? he asks, pointing to his bed.

- Bed, or bed, or whatever you like, sir.

“You should call it a “vacation retreat.” And this? - asks the gentleman, pointing to his drawers.

- Pants, or trousers, or whatever you like, sir.

“You should call them “fanfare headlights.” And this? he asks, pointing to the cat.

- Cat, or kitty, or whatever you like, sir.

“You should call her “Felicia Whiteface.” What would you call it? he asks, pointing to the water.

- Water, or moisture, or whatever you like, sir.

“You should call it “wet mundia.”

And this? - he points to the fire.

- Fire, or flame, or whatever you like, sir.

“You should call it “red rooster.” And this?” he points to his house.

- House, or mansion, or whatever you like, sir.

- You should call it “the vastness of heaven.”

That same night, the owner is awakened by the frightened cry of the maid:

- Lord of lords! Get off your resting place quickly and put on your headlights and fanfare! White-faced Felicia knocked over the candle, so that if you don’t run after Mocromundia right now, the red rooster will burn your entire mass under heaven.

Owl wise little head

Once upon a time there lived not a tsar-prince, not a king-prince, not a sage and not a wizard, not a magician and not a hermit, not a nobleman and not a nobleman, not a cautious politician, not a minister, not a military man, not an arrogant official, not a fat merchant , not a mellifluous singer, not a doctor or a healer, in a word - just a plowman, a daring peasant named Burachok. And he had a mind that was not royal, and not noble, and not lordly, but, as they say, the most peasant mind.

Once Burachok was in town, went to the market and bought a goggle-eyed owl there for a few pennies as a gift for his son. He walked with her back to his village. By evening Burachok was tired and began to think about spending the night. He looks: there is a light in the hut nearby. “Let me take a look there,” he thinks. Maybe good people will let you spend the night.”

He goes to the window and sees: on a table covered with a white tablecloth, there is a pie, fluffy and ruddy, just asking to be put into your mouth, and next to it is a roast goose and a bottle of honey. A fat young woman is sitting on a bench, knitting mittens, singing songs, waiting for her husband.

“You can’t say anything - the dinner is suitable!” - thought Burachok and knocked on the window: knock-knock!

- Who's there? Is that you, Metek?

- Let the passerby warm up, beauty.

The hostess began to fuss, running around the hut: in an instant the pie flew from the table into the kneading bowl, a bottle of honey into the chest, and a roast goose into the oven.

Tell me, is there a lot of relaxed fun, laughter, and joint jokes in your communication with your child? But it is precisely such moments that are remembered as the happiest. This collection contains funny books for children of all ages, for schoolchildren and preschoolers. Because laughing is good for everyone. By the way, parents too. Such books are unlikely to be assigned to read at school. But children love funny books - to laugh and laugh. At the same time, in addition to being fun, many of the books in this collection are instructive, even if inadvertently.

Eduard Uspensky “About the girl Vera and the monkey Anfisa. Vera and Anfisa continue"

One day, Vera’s dad accidentally – and completely free of charge – got a real monkey. He brought her home, and the monkey named Anfisa began to live in the apartment. Together with the girl Vera, her parents and grandmother. They were having fun and not at all bored. Of course, more often to Vera than to adults. Anfisa went with Vera to kindergarten, visited the clinic, and one day they both managed to get lost. The book consists of two parts, “How it all began” and “Vera and Anfisa continue.” In the second part, many of the descriptions are already closer to modern times - there is the Internet, 3D cinema and much more, which was difficult to even think about in Soviet times. Stories about Vera and Anfisa first appeared in print in 1985 and have been beloved by children ever since. A puppet cartoon was made based on the book. The book is suitable for preschoolers, but older children will also appreciate these funny stories.

Benjamin Renner "Big Scary Fox"

Big Scary Fox is, of course, sarcasm. Because none of the animals was afraid of this Fox, so he had to eat turnips and beets. Well, what kind of mood will such vegetarian food give you? And the Fox dreams of meat and how he will become the main villain of the forest. One day our hero met the Wolf. He invites the Fox to steal several eggs from the chicken coop, raise the chicks and then eat them. Of course, sharing with the Wolf. But for the awkward Fox, everything doesn’t go according to plan: after hatching, the chickens begin to call him mommy, the fox becomes attached to them and has no idea how he can eat such cute babies. In this funny story, funny ironic dialogues are interspersed with unexpected plot twists, there is a lot of humor and wordplay. The annotation says that the book is for children from 5 years old, but it’s unlikely that all the humor can be appreciated at that age. Rather, it is suitable for younger schoolchildren. Large format book, 192 pages. Designed in the form of a comic book. The illustrations are funny, with detailed depictions of emotions.

Tyukhtyaev L., Tyukhtyaeva I. “Zoki and Bada”

Once upon a time there lived a black bada. He lived in a house by a pond. He mowed the grass, carried water, and then got himself bees, and the sweet life began for Bada. He should have lived and been happy, but then he got sick. Right in the jar of honey. The Zoks turned out to have mischievous sweet tooths. They often argued with each other and got into various troubles. Bada at first wanted to get rid of the Zoks, but over time he fell in love with them. The fairy tale is a little reminiscent of the famous cartoon “Masha and the Bear”, only here the characters’ dialogues are filled with funny wordplay. But in general, it’s still the same bada - the personification of a parent, zoki - naughty children. Moreover, the zoks and the badas have their own desires and feelings that can and should be discussed as we read. The characters in the book learn to accept each other and eventually realize that they really need each other. 144 pages, hardcover. A4 format.

Karen Harutyunyants “The Donut is on the Trail”

One day, a dog named Donut got lost, but did not lose heart, but went in search of his owner. Many difficulties and hardships await him, but the dog does not lose heart, finds new friends and even manages to forgive the found owner, who, as it turned out, abandoned Donut himself. An exciting and funny story about the adventures of a dog, written not just for laughs. The book teaches a humane and responsible attitude towards animals - the feelings of dogs abandoned by their owners are described in detail there. Black and white illustrations are not on every spread. 240 pages, hardcover. For younger schoolchildren.

David Kali “I didn’t do my homework because...”

There comes a time in the life of any schoolchild when you were so hoping that they wouldn’t ask, but for some reason the teacher asks you exactly where your homework is. Then you really want something to happen that justifies the lack of homework! Well, what happens there? The ceiling fell on his head, spent the whole evening leading old women across the road, saving children from an ice hole... The hero of the book not only describes everything that we once dreamed of, his incredible adventures are accompanied by funny illustrations. One turn – one or two reasons for unfinished lessons. A whole plane of monkeys flew into the yard, all the pencils were stolen by the gnomes, the neighbor challenged his uncle to a duel, and the grandfather and the ensemble made so much noise that it was absolutely impossible to concentrate. The book, of course, is not for repeated reading, but you will laugh heartily. And then you can remember the careless schoolboy if your child decides to follow in his footsteps. 48 pages, hardcover.

Andrey Usachev “Wrong fairy tales”

There are classic fairy tales, with meaning, “correct”, where “the fairy tale is a lie, but there is a hint in it...”, and there are funny parodies of these fairy tales, something that strict aunts and uncles are unlikely to pass up for study at school. That's why these books are interesting! By the way, they also motivate you to read the originals in order to evaluate the changes. Therefore, in this book it is written right on the first page that it is not recommended for children under six years of age to read. Simply because they are not yet familiar with the original version of fairy tales and will not be able to understand the humor. But those who have already read the fairy tales of Pushkin, Perrault, Afanasyev will definitely notice both the irony and the changes. The book is small, 48 pages, hardcover. The pictures, with their originality and their own humor, perfectly complement the poems. The result is such an original humorous collection for modern children.

Julian Clary "Tailstones. Book 1. Hyenas in the city"

What kind of strange people have settled in the city? Amelia and Fred seem to be decent residents, good parents for their children, but there are some strange things in their behavior; they constantly laugh. And they don’t just giggle, they laugh! For some reason, they really love trash cans and are constantly looking for something there, and once someone even noticed that they had tails under their coats! An ironic, very funny story in the style of “The Simpsons” or the TV series “Alf”. However, there are no inappropriate biting jokes here, so you can safely take it for children 7–9 years old. The black and white illustrations, like the text, have a slightly crazy edge, a little on the edge, but kids are more likely to like it than not. Older children and adults will also appreciate it. The volume of the book is 272 pages. Large font, suitable for independent reading by younger students.

Dragunsky V., Pivovarova I., Panteleev L. et al. “Funny stories about school”

The classics are immortal. Moreover, the classics are recommended by the Ministry of Education, so you can always safely take such books for your child - you can’t go wrong! You don’t even have to invent funny stories from school life; they often happen in reality, it’s just that not everyone has time to write them down. But some people succeed, and then you can read, bursting into laughter, laughing, reading one story after another. The collection includes works by the above-mentioned authors, as well as Sasha Cherny, Marina Pivovarova and Viktor Golyavkin. The stories are suitable for primary schoolchildren aged 7 years and older. Soft cover, small format, black and white illustrations, 64 pages. However, you can find quite a lot of similar collections on sale; they are convenient to take with you on the road and read at your leisure.

Edward Lear "The Cricket on the Nose"

Reading this book, the famous “The House That Jack Built” comes to mind, that is, the humor here is not so much funny as it is subtle. Absurd limericks that you still need to be able to understand. But Antonenkov’s funny illustrations help you get in the right frame of mind and catch the irony. Although, most likely, for younger schoolchildren this will just be a “cool” book for light leisure time. If you read these poems thoughtfully, you can expand the boundaries of perception, which is useful for the brain at any age. Observation has never hurt anyone; thanks to it, you can understand a lot. The book contains 14 poems. Moreover, most of them are long. Hardcover, colorful illustrations, 48 pages.

Arthur Givargizov “Cunning Zubov”

Short and witty stories from the lives of schoolchildren friends, about the adventures that happen to them in ordinary life. There are stories here about poor students and excellent students, about cunning hooligans and ordinary guys. Someone, having read it, may recognize themselves or the neighbor's boy. The font is convenient for independent reading by a 7-8 year old child. The atmosphere of modern school life is conveyed very accurately and vividly. A kind of Dragunsky after 80 years. Thick cover, 96 pages, light pencil drawings that complement the narrative.

Hare

A poor man was walking through an open field, saw a hare under a bush, was delighted and said:

- That’s when I’ll live in a house! I’ll take this hare, kill it with a whip and sell it for four altyns. With that money I will buy a pig. She will bring me twelve little pigs. The piglets will grow up and produce twelve more. I'll kill everyone, I'll save up a barn of meat. I’ll sell the meat, and with the money I’ll start a house and get married myself. My wife will give birth to two sons for me: Vaska and Vanka. The children will start plowing the arable land, and I will sit under the window and restore order: “Hey you guys, I’ll shout, Vaska and Vanka! Don’t push people too hard at work, you didn’t live in poverty yourself!” The man shouted so loudly that the hare got scared and ran away, and the house with all its wealth, wife and children disappeared.

Hey, bring in the horse (Italian fairy tale)

The driver Petruchio got married. After the wedding, he brought his young wife into the house and said to her:

- Now you and I, Rosina, will live well! I will work, you will manage. I'm not afraid of work. Even if you order me to drive a horse from dawn to dark, it will do nothing. But once I get home, that’s it! The rest is up to you. I’ll just stop the cart at the gate and shout: “Hey, bring in the horse!” - You hurry up and run out.

- Here's another! - said Rosina. - I’ll start tinkering with the horse.

- How can you not bother with her, because you need to unharness her, feed her, and give her something to drink! So, as soon as I shout: “Hey, bring in the horse!” “Yes, I’m telling you,” Rosina interrupted her husband, “that I won’t touch the horse.” This is not what I was taught at my mother and father’s house.

“Don’t worry,” said Petruchio, “I’ll teach you everything.” You will bring the horse into the yard. . .

- I won’t enter it!

- That is, how can you not enter it if I shouted: “Hey, enter it!..”?

- You scream, but I don’t move.

“Oh, Rosina,” said Petruchio, “don’t make me angry, it’s better to bring in the horse.”

- I won’t enter it! - Rosina shouted.

Then Petruchio also shouted.

- Enter it now!

- I won’t enter it!

- Enter!

- I won’t enter it!

Neighbors came running in response to the noise and began asking the newlyweds:

-What are you doing? What is the dispute about? Petruchio began to explain to the neighbors:

- Yes, my wife doesn’t want to help me. I tell her:

“Bring in the horse,” and she says: “I won’t.”

“Aren’t you ashamed to quarrel over this?” - said old Giuseppe. - Let me bring in your horse. Where do you have it?

“Yes, you see,” Petruchio hesitated, “we don’t have a horse yet.” I'm just about to buy it.

Cool short tales

Bunny and Squirrel

Once upon a time there lived a Bunny and a Squirrel. They were friends and loved each other. One day the Bunny suggests: “Squirrel, let’s live together and get married.” - How so, because you are a Bunny, and I am a Squirrel. – The power of our love is higher than stereotypes and species-racial considerations, Squirrel. We began to live as a family, and there was love and understanding. There are just no children. They became sad. The Bunny says: “Do we really not have children because I am a Bunny and you are a Squirrel?” How so? Let's go to Owl, she's smart, she knows everything. They came to the Owl and the Bunny said: “Owl, tell me why we don’t have children?” Because we are Bunny and Squirrel? - Are you crazy or what? You don’t have children because you are a boy and he is also a boy!

golden piranha

There lived an old man and an old woman near Lake Chad. The old man went fishing. The first time I threw in curare poison, only toads surfaced. The second time I threw curare poison - only crocodiles surfaced. The third time I threw the poison curare - the Golden Piranha surfaced and wanted to say, let me go older, I will fulfill three cherished wishes, but I could not, because I was paralyzed. The old man returned to the old woman with the prey, the old woman was delighted, they salted the toads for the winter, they dried the crocodiles for the summer, and instantly ate the Golden Piranha straight raw. So all three wishes came true by themselves.

Sister Alyonushka and brother Ivanushka

Once upon a time there lived a sister Alyonushka and a brother Ivanushka. Alyonushka was smart and hard-working, and Ivanushka was an alcoholic. How many times did his sister tell him: “Don’t drink, Ivanushka, you’ll become a little goat!” But Ivanushka did not listen and drank. One day he bought burnt vodka at a kiosk, drank it, and felt like he couldn’t stand on two legs anymore, he had to drop down to four points. And then the shameful wolves come up to him and say: “Well, you goat, have you finished drinking?” And they kicked him so hard on the horns that he threw off his hooves... And his sister Alyonushka got his apartment, because good always triumphs over evil!

Bear Hut

Bear's hut. -Who ate from my plate? - Father Bear asks menacingly. - Who ate from my plate? - asks the eldest son. - Who ate from my plate? - the youngest son squeaks. “You idiots, I haven’t poured some for you yet.” - the bear answers.

A soldier was returning from service

A soldier was walking home from service. He knocked on the way to one house. “Let me in,” he says, “to spend the night, masters.” And in the house lived a greedy old woman. “Sleep over,” she said, “but I don’t have anything to treat you with.” “It’s not a problem,” the soldier answered, “just give me an ax, and I’ll cook porridge from it.” “What, soldier,” the old woman was indignant, “do you think I’m completely stupid? What will I use to chop wood later?” So the soldier remained, not eating any salt. And his name, by the way, was Rodion Raskolnikov.

How Ivan guarded the door

There lived an old man and an old woman. They had three sons: two were smart, and the third was a fool. The brothers and their parents began to get ready for work. Ivan the Fool also began to get ready - he took crackers and poured water into the eggplant. They ask him: “Where are you going?” -To work with you. -You won't go anywhere. Guard the door well so that thieves do not enter. The fool was left alone at home. Late in the evening he took the door off its hinges, put it on his back and carried it. Came to the arable land. The brothers ask: “Why did you come?” -I wanted to eat. “We told you to guard the door.” - Yes, here she is!

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How the master hatched a foal (Latvian fairy tale)

Once upon a time there lived a gentleman who loved horses more than anything in the world. There was only one thing on his mind - to get horses like no one else had. As soon as he hears about the horse fair, he drops everything and goes there, even though the lady herself is dying. Once this inveterate horseman went to the fair and met a peasant with a cart of cucumbers.

- What are you bringing? - the master asked him. And the peasant, the cunning one, answers:

“I’m bringing eggs that can be hatched into foals, the likes of which no one has ever had before.”

“Show me,” the master asked. The peasant showed it. The master chose the largest of these eggs and asked:

— How much does such an egg cost? And the peasant, the cunning one, answers:

- Three hundred rubles! The master pulled out his wallet and counted out three hundred rubles. And as he was leaving, the peasant finally looked back at the master and said:

“You need to put the egg in a pot and sit on it until the foal hatches.” And if anyone asks about what, he must answer only one thing: whoa! With that they parted, and each went his own way.

The master, returning home, immediately sat down to hatch the foal. The lady asked him why he was sitting for so long, and the master barked: whoa! Such an outlandish answer made the lady very angry, but, knowing what kind of husband she was, she left him alone - let him sit there. She ordered him to bring him food and drink, but she didn’t say another word to him. The master hatched and hatched, sat on the potty for three or four weeks, but never hatched anything. The master became completely depressed, and finally got tired of hatching the egg. He got angry, grabbed a pot of cucumber, ran into the forest and in his anger threw it into a pile of brushwood. Then suddenly a hare jumped out of a pile of brushwood and galloped into the forest. And the master shouts after him:

- Mob, mow, little coward, mow, mow!

But the hare got scared by the noise, ran at full speed and disappeared into the thicket. The master was sad, became sad and went home. And on the way he met the same peasant from whom he bought a cucumber for three hundred rubles. The master told the peasant that he had completely hatched a foal that no one else had, and, like a fool, he threw it away himself. And the peasant, the cunning one, listened, listened and said:

“That’s what happens to all the fools who don’t even know how to hatch a foal.” The master returned home and told the lady about his bitter fate. And when she heard what a fool her husband was, she didn’t want to see him anymore.

I want to tell you a fairy tale that recently came into my head when I was putting my five-year-old son to bed. There was a lot of laughter, probably from the unexpected turn of a well-known plot. And I love it when my baby laughs! Since his birth, I have been making up fairy tales for him myself. I can’t really tell the well-known ones, but I can easily tell the spontaneously invented ones. So. This tale is about Kolobok, only in a different way.

Everything starts as usual.

Once upon a time there lived a grandfather and a woman. They felt sad without their children. They decided to bake a bun for themselves to enjoy. Grandfather swept the bottom of the barrel. Grandma kneaded the dough and baked a ruddy bun in the oven. I put it on a plate in the window to cool. Kolobok became bored. He jumped out of the window and rolled along the path. It's rolling on and on. He thinks: “Now, because of that bush, Bunny will appear. He will ask who I am. And I’ll sing him a song about how I’m swept over the bottom of the barrel, and set in the stove, and baked ruddy. But the Hare will want to eat me, and I will run away from him.” Kolobok rolls and rolls, but no one runs out to meet him. It turns out that the Hare went to another fairy tale today, about “Teremok”. He has no time. Kolobok sighed and rolled on. He thinks: “Well, okay, but now the Wolf will meet me, he will also want to eat me, and I will outwit him and run away!” It just rolls and rolls, and the Wolf is not visible either.

Gray went to guard Little Red Riding Hood. There will be a bigger catch - a whole basket of pies and a plump grandmother. Eh! Kolobok is unlucky again! There is no one to sing your songs to. He felt sad. Well, okay, he rolled on. There was also a Bear and a Fox. He'll have a blast on Mishka! Roll on, roll on. I've already rolled up to his den. But there is no one, the lock is hanging. Potapych went to visit the three bears. They called and said that Alyonushka should come by one o’clock, just in time for lunch. They'll throw a feast! Oh, Kolobok is unlucky today! I should have stayed at home and watched cartoons! Rolls further along the path. He's looking out for the fox. This is just a useless activity. Lisa Patrikeevna went shopping for a new fur coat. I haven't worked up an appetite yet. Out of despair, Kolobok climbed onto a tree stump and shed tears. And under the stump the Hedgehog was sleeping in the grass. He woke up with kolobok tears. He asks: “Why are you freaking out, Kolobok?” “Well,” Kolobok answers, “no one wants to listen to my wonderful song and eat me. There’s no time for everyone!” The Hedgehog listened to him and said: “Don’t be sad! Come and have some tea with strawberry jam!” Kolobok was cheerful, and they went to the Hedgehog to drink tea!

PS What a fairy tale!

After this we began a whole series of funny fairy tales. Moreover, the son also tries to remake well-known fairy tales in his own way and laughs every time.

violetta karpova