Funny and cool toasts
A funny toast is always welcome: it could be a loved one’s birthday, an anniversary, a corporate event, or just a get-together of a friendly group. A cool humorous greeting or saying will be remembered by all guests. This collection contains both short and long toasts that will make your holiday more fun.
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A wealthy businessman decided to get married and turned to a marriage office to find him a lady from high society. - Beautiful, naturally? – asked the marriage agent. - Certainly. Such that one could say about her that she seemed to have stepped out of a painting,” the businessman clarified his desire. After the bureau arranged a meeting for him, he burst into the marriage office, sputtering with indignation: “I asked you: beautiful, like in a picture.” And who are you giving me: ears like burdocks, nose sticking out onto my lip, eyes slanted. “Sir, don’t make so much noise,” one of the agents turned to him. - It's a matter of taste. Some people like Raphael, and some are crazy about Picasso. So let's drink to the variety of tastes that don't argue about.
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A turtle is swimming along the river with a snake sitting on its back. The snake thinks: “If I bite, it will throw me off!” The turtle thinks: “If I throw it away, it will bite!” So let's drink to faithful female friendship, which helps to overcome all obstacles!
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Country yard. In the corner, a rooster is actively courting a hen. And at this time a Georgian comes out onto the porch. He has a bag of seeds in his hand, which he lazily gnaws. Then he picks up a handful and throws it on the ground. The rooster, noticing the seeds, leaves his girlfriend and begins to peck them. The Georgian, seeing this scene, sadly shook his head: “God forbid you go hungry like that!” I suggest you drink to the abundance!
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– Stop being picky! - the wife says to her husband at dinner. – On Monday you ate mashed peas for lunch, on Tuesday and Wednesday too, on Thursday you agreed, but today you suddenly became capricious. Let's drink to our housewives feeding us not only pea puree, but also the same dishes that now decorate this table!
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One no longer young woman was asked if she remembered her first man. “A man - I don’t remember when - I don’t remember, but I remember that ... a barrel organ!” Let's drink to the hope that all our men, regardless of name and other circumstances, will be simply charming!
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The lover brings three cinema tickets. - Why three? – my friend was surprised. - What do you mean why? For your mother, for your father and for your brother. Let's drink to the ability of men to achieve privacy!
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Excavator Masha dug a pit and unearthed the tomb of an Egyptian pharaoh. The lid of the sarcophagus moved, and Masha saw a young handsome prince. He looked as if he were alive. Masha could not stand it and kissed the prince. And a miracle happened - the prince came to life. – How can I thank you, Masha? – asked the young pharaoh. – Do you want me to fulfill any seven of your wishes? “I don’t need seven wishes,” said Masha, one wish is better, but seven times... The pharaoh agreed, but died on the fifth visit. So let's drink to the excavator Masha, who did not allow the slave system to be revived!
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Two friends meet. – Are you happy with your husband? – asks one of them. – I’m so happy... We love each other so deeply that we have already postponed the divorce several times... Let’s drink to strong love!
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A woman is created to make a man happy, no matter where this unfortunate man hides. So let's drink so that our happiness always finds us!
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Women gathered for the International Congress. For three days they talked and talked, without any agenda, quarreled, argued... Finally, they decided: 1. All men are bastards. 2. There is not enough space in the closet. 3. There is absolutely nothing to wear. Let's drink to ensure that our women never come to such conclusions.
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There is a mountain of Love in Asia. Many legends are associated with it. Listen to one of them. One day, a young shepherd and a princess fell in love with each other and ran away from home. They immediately rushed in pursuit. The lovers climbed this mountain. They were about to be overtaken. And then the young man said to the princess: “Let me jump first, and then you decide what to do next.” But the princess refused, because she could not bear such torment. And she was the first to rush down and, of course, crashed. The shepherd looked at her lifeless body and simply descended from the Mountain of Love. So let's drink to the men who are still the first to leave the elevator!
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The victim's case was heard in one of the courts. “Are you saying that the accused took the money right out of your bra?” – asked the judge. “Yes, Your Honor,” the victim replied. - So why didn’t you resist? – the judge was surprised. “I thought he had good intentions,” the upset girl shrugged! So let's drink to men with good intentions!
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I propose a toast to the Greens! Do you think this toast is dedicated to frogs? No! And not Greenpeace! I want to drink this glass so that we can have lots and lots of greens! In short, for bucks, which would have been too tight to lie in our pockets and we kept them in big, big bags in the cellar and... But for some reason I was completely daydreaming, babbling, because it was high time for a drink! For the green ones!
Words of gratitude to the guests from the hero of the day
Today I celebrate my anniversary, you came to congratulate me. They gave me a sea of happiness and an ocean of great love.
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Thank you for your wishes, for your positive attitude, I am not afraid of doping like this. For life, any hurricane.
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- On an anniversary, it is so nice to gather at the table those people from whom goodness emanates, those people with whom it is warm and reliable, with whom you can share joy.
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Thank you for this faithful circle, for the strong shoulder that one will lend, for the wise words, speaking friend. We need to take care and appreciate each other!
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Thank you, dear guests, for a large number of kind words, for your tenderness, kindness, for everything I thank you!
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Because you found the time, you came to me for my anniversary. I wish everyone from the bottom of my heart that all their dreams come true.
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Thank you, guests, that today’s anniversary has become a wonderful occasion for everyone to get together, Thank you for your kind words, for your joy and for your wishes of happiness.
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- There are no random people here at the table, Fate has brought us together for more than one year, And I will say today from the bottom of my heart, You are the most important gift to the hero of the day.
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Thank you all, friends, for your congratulations! Thanks everyone for the kind words! From happiness, from wine and from fun. Now my head is spinning.
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Without you there would be no such holiday. Thanks to everyone for being there! And this anniversary, I give you my word, has become the best day of my life.
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I am happy to see you, pour you a glass, Thank you for deciding not to forget Me.
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I solemnly give you the word of the hero of the day: On the next date, I will pour it for you again!
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- Countless toasts were raised to my health and success. It’s my turn, of course, to sincerely thank everyone!
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Thank you for not regretting, No congratulations, no praise. And my anniversary, now modest, became a real triumph.
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And let the years fly like birds, Already a new prophetic anniversary. But I'm looking forward to it, To gather everyone again with friends!
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I believe that the words are from the heart, I wish you and I peace, May life always be worthy, I love you all, my friends.
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I want to raise this glass to you all, without exception. Who attended the anniversary today and gave me a great mood.
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There were toasts in my honor, and touching congratulations. You are not very dear to everyone, you have my gratitude and my respect.
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Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I, dear guests, you gave me the main gift for my anniversary.
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Your love and friendship became this gift to me. To be completely happy, I don’t need to desire anything else.
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And to my friends, I raise an appropriate toast. Let friendship continue through the years, uniting us all.
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In response to my words to the guests at the anniversary, your congratulations make my head spin, And my heart is so pleased for your respect, And for your love, for your affection, thank you for your patience!
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Let there be warmth and understanding in your families, Let love not leave, not say goodbye, Let youth play and not let you cry, And let your gaze be directed towards the better, forward!
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Thank you to all your family and friends, the hero of the day is grateful to you, Please accept counter messages. My confessions to you from the heart!
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Thank you for all the words that you didn’t forget about me, that you brought so many warm words of love into my heart!
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Compassionate, bright days to you, Health, which is most important, Happy and radiant love, Golden rays of goodness to you!
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How many friends, relatives, loved ones have gathered here for the anniversary, Together we are all invincible, We decorate each other’s lives!
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I love you very much from the bottom of my heart, I am grateful from the bottom of my heart, And I dedicate these lines to you, After all, congratulations are beautiful!
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May peace and happiness be with you, And joy, and love, and laughter, In such wonderful company, I want to see everyone again!
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My dear guests! I need to find words so that you know: gratitude came from my soul!
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You are here today to celebrate my anniversary! They tried to express their kindness to me as soon as possible!
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Relatives, loved ones, all your guests, Thank you for your friendship and love, For coming to the anniversary, Your words make my heart feel good.
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To you, dear guests, I want to say in response: There is no one more kind, more beautiful, more cheerful, more generous, more original and more festive, You are the best at this anniversary!
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And the holiday took place thanks to all of you, My soul is full of warmth and light, And sincerely, cordially to you, dear guests, I say thank you to everyone for this!
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Thank you, dear guests, for coming to us for our anniversary. We are grateful, dear, dear ones, for having so many loyal friends!
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We are so grateful to you for the positive moments, for the jokes, ringing laughter and compliments, and for the hundredth time we say thank you, May everyone be happy and loved!
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We wish we all meet more often, spend minutes like this more often. Never be upset in life, And never rush time.
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Thank you for this evening, for all the smiles, wishes, for your sincerity and your speeches, and very kind confessions!
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It's my anniversary and I'm very excited. Guests, my heartfelt gratitude to you. I admire such guests from the heart. There are relatives, colleagues, family and friends here.
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From the bottom of my heart I want to thank all the guests today for coming to congratulate me on my anniversary and being able to pay attention to me!
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On my anniversary, I say thank you, guests. I thank everyone for your wishes.
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For the fact that you turned this special day into a holiday, For the fact that everyone was cheerful and joyful.
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They didn’t spare kind words and wished you happiness. Thank you for everyone celebrating my anniversary together.
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I thank each of you, that on this day and at this time, everyone was able to come to my anniversary, and spend time profitably!
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For congratulations, warm words, For the fact that I am always with you, I can talk about a lot, I can remain silent about the main thing!
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Thank you for the warmth, for the fact that you care, for the fact that we laugh merrily, and that the wine flows like a river!
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To all the guests at the anniversary I say “Thank you!” I say, you did not spare kind words, for which I thank you.
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May good wishes be returned to you 100 times, So that everyone in life will be rich in happiness and good luck.
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There were many congratulations. We had a great anniversary. But I also want to say a lot: Thank you all for coming to me.
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With you, this day has become much more beautiful, Joyful and brighter, finally. Moreover, I won’t decorate it at all if I say: everyone here is a great guy.
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Thank you, dear guests, for coming to the Anniversary. It’s nice for me to meet such years among friends.
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I am so glad to hear from you, your congratulations are a flurry. How amazing! That I spent this hour with you.
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Thank you, dear guests, for coming to us today. They stopped by for our anniversary and found their time for us!
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I say thank you to the guests, For bringing your love to this anniversary, On one of the best days in your life.
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For wishes and toasts, for sincere congratulations. Thank you, dear guests, and good luck to you everywhere, always!
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Dear guests, I thank you all, I love you very, very much and value you all, On the day of the anniversary, I am pleased to receive your words, My head is spinning from your wonderful wishes!
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My anniversary brought together a lot of guests. And I will express my gratitude to everyone again. May the road of life be bright for you, May goodness and love accompany you!
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Thank you for your wishes, friends. Thank you to my family for being with me now. Let all your plans, desires come true, May there be an eternal supply of energy and strength!
